#EndMommyWars

I am not sure if you are aware of it, but Similac has been doing a social media campaign to #EndMommyWars.  Women can share their experiences of being judged by other women and help spread the word that we should be supporting not condemning each other.  Yes, I am aware that it is a marketing ploy to bring positive publicity to the formula company but that doesn’t make their message any less impactful.

I have posted a big part of my parenting philosophy before.  That I do what feels right for me and my family.  And, I am OK with that.  I know that there will always be people out there who will judge me for not doing things by their “right” way.  But, I’m not going to take it personally.  It is pointless.  I will probably share a lot of unpopular opinions on this blog as time goes on but, I know what I’m getting into.  I’ll either have people comment their disapproval or they won’t read my posts anymore or they will be a grown up and chalk it up to a difference of opinion.

There is a lot of hate out there.  So I say: HEAR YE HEAR YE MOMS:  If you aren’t beating your child, starving your child, or otherwise committing some kind of torturous act upon your child you are likely doing the right thing.  I use likely because I didn’t mention things like murder and some people out there may take that as a green light…

There are too many threads out there where moms do nothing but criticize each other.  When did we become such a spiteful and hateful culture?  Well, historically we always have been but that’s another post altogether.  What I mean though, is why do we care so much about what another mom is doing that we feel the need to pee all over her parade?  Being a mom is hard enough.  Being a parent, period, is hard enough.

Do you breastfeed?  Great!  Formula feed?  Equally great!  Because that means you care about making sure your child is fed.  It doesn’t matter the reasoning behind it.  Whether it is from lack of production, lack of trying, or the child being adopted, it doesn’t matter.  Yes, we all know that scientifically breast is best and I can guarantee that someone, somewhere has already informed the parents of this.  There is no need to shame them further.  They should not have to explain the circumstances that let to that decision to you, you don’t matter when it comes down to it.  What matters is that their child is being fed.

Stay at home moms, you are no better than working moms.  Working moms you have it no harder than stay at home moms.  Both are equally important in our society and both a equally hard.  As a working mom you give up a lot of those little moments with your child, you miss a lot of firsts.  As a stay at home mom you become “just mom” and lose a lot of your autonomy, your sense of self.  Having done both, I can agree both are equally stressful. To say or pretend otherwise is just playing the victim.  Which, I think we can all agree there is too much of in this culture.  So, put your big girl pants on, stop complaining, and find what there is to be thankful for.

I had a recent experience with a troll on Facebook that called me cruel because I admitted to letting my boys cry it out.  I can tell you the number of times I’ve done it, 3.  I can explain what got me to the point where I had to tell myself that they were clean, fed, and in a safe place and just take a step back.  And I can tell you that I shouldn’t have to explain myself and I’m not going to, at least not now.

If you are the type of person that thinks something is wrong and can’t admit there there are circumstances you haven’t experienced that would require you to do things differently than you have, you aren’t reading the right blog.  Coincidentally you are also, almost exclusively, what is wrong with the world.

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